There You Are
by Nocturnal Elle
Summary: What if Hatter and Alice are living their happily-ever-after domestic bliss and one day, he's forgotten EVERYTHING that happened after he came through the Looking Glass?
1. Mrs Hatter

**A gazillion thanks to rhien for her help on this story. (Actually, a gazillion probably isn't enough.)**

* * *

Like most people, Alice hated hospitals. She sipped coffee in the waiting room and studied the walls.

As hospital visits went, she supposed it was better to be there under her current circumstances — waiting for her husband while he had a routine procedure – than oh, say, having an emergency c-section. One of those was quite enough for a lifetime.

That was four years ago, when her son was born. Her daughter had come three years before that. And then, of course, was ten years ago, waking up to find she'd only been gone an hour.

Wow, had it really been ten years? Where did the time go?

A voice interrupted her train of thought.

"He's waking up now."

Alice threw away her coffee cup and followed the nurse.

Hatter looked groggy, and there was still an IV in his arm. But everything about him, from his unruly dark hair to the way he shifted when he saw her was so familiar, it made her smile.

"Alice," he said tiredly, and the sound of his voice filled her with warmth.

Then he asked her a question and knocked her a little off-balance.

"I'm in... your world?"

That had to be the drugs wearing off. "Yeah, silly."

He blinked slowly. "You cut your hair."

"Yeah, a bit." Last year. "Um, Hatter? Do you–" Her query was interrupted by a doctor entering the room.

"Your husband's results came back clean," she addressed Alice.

At the mention of her husband, Hatter frowned.

"You might want to wait a few weeks and then schedule another appointment," the physician continued. "As he comes around, don't be alarmed if his short-term memory is off. That's just the effects of putting him under. You might have to answer the same questions a few times today."

Alice nodded, and the doctor promised that once the anesthesia was completely worn off, they could go home.

"Should be sometime this afternoon," she glanced at the chart. "Mrs. Hatter."

With a cursory smile, she left.

Hatter pushed himself up to sitting. "You're married to... me?"


	2. All gone now

Alice sat on the edge of the bed.

"You're freaking me out here, Hatter. What's going on?"

He looked at his surroundings. "Have I been injured? Are we in a hospital?"

Alice ignored his questions in favor of one of her own. "Do you really not remember we're married?"

He opened his mouth, but a yawn came out instead of words.

Alice tried again. "What _is_ the last thing you remember?"

He took a moment to think. "The Looking Glass chamber." He looked at her and smiled fondly. "Coming to see you."

She softened; it was a sweet memory. "But you don't… Do you remember _anything_ after that?"

He grinned at her, still obviously under intravenous influence. "Are we really married?"

She took a deep breath. "Okay, you know what? You're fine. Or at least, you _will_ be fine."

This was just one of those Wonderland Things. Like his weirdly accurate sense of direction or being allergic to pumpkins.

She leaned into him and dropped her voice. "But you can't say anything about Wonderland to the nurses, okay?"

"Why am I so tired?" He let his head fall back to the pillow. "Have we been running from a jabberwock?"

"See, that's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about. Don't say jabberwock."

He nodded like he understood, but he was already drifting off.

_Sleep is good_, Alice thought. _Then he'll wake up and be back to normal._

While he was out, a nurse came to remove his IV and he barely even stirred. Alice signed the papers for his release and then nudged him awake once they were alone again.

He seemed more alert.

"You cut your hair," he noted.

Alice let out a breath. "Yeah. Let's get you home."

* * *

"How long have I been here?" Hatter asked as Alice drove.

"A little over a decade."

"That long?"

He looked out the car's window, idly tapping his fingers on his knee. The streets were so flat; Alice must feel safe here.

"Do I… ever go back? To Wonderland?"

"You used to." Alice slowed down to pull into their driveway. "You quit once the kids were born."

He stopped drumming his fingers.

"We have kids?"

Alice made a face he recognized. It was one reserved, in his memory, for cities not built on the ground and articulated birds of the Empyrean. He didn't like being the cause for That Look.


	3. Of course he knows

"We have a girl and a boy. My mom's here keeping them. Right. You don't know my mom. Carol. Her name's Carol. The kids are Charlie and–"

Alice would have liked to have more time to prep Hatter, but their front door was already opening.

"They saw you pull in," her mother said over the squeals of her children inside. "I told them they had to ask you before they could have more candy."

Their seven-year-old daughter pushed ahead. "I told her you'd let us have a serving size, and I can read now, so I know that's four pieces, but Nonnie only let us have two…"

Alice held up a hand to halt the onslaught, and their son slipped around her and made a beeline for his father's legs.

"Daddy!"

Hatter let out a little "oof" and patted the boy's head. "Hey, there, Charlie."

Alice winced as her daughter's eyes whipped to her, candy forgotten. Nothing went past the child.

"Daddy's joking," Alice said lightly. "Of course he knows _you're_ Charlie. And yes, you can have two more pieces. Each. Will you help your brother open his?"

As the kids took off back to the kitchen, Carol's face turned to one of concern. "What's wrong?"

"Hatter doesn't remember anything..." Alice dropped her voice "after Wonderland."

"Oh, my." Carol put her hand on her chest. "Did the doctor say if that was unusual?"

"Mom, it's not like we could ask." Alice threw her purse in a chair. "'Oh, by the way, my husband is from the other side of the Looking Glass. Has this happened to Wonderlanders before?'"

"Don't get snippy with me," her mother warned.

• X •

Hatter watched the exchange quietly. He quickly saw where Alice had inherited some of her demeanor.

Alice closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. This has me–" she broke off. "Thank you for keeping the kids."

"Do you want me to stay?" Carol asked.

"No. They'll know something's wrong." Alice twisted the rings on her left hand.

_Huh_, Hatter thought. _I gave those to her. Probably._

He felt so helpless, not knowing. If he looked too closely at the feeling, it would swallow him. So he locked it away and focused on his immediate surroundings.

There was a collection of hats by the door. He took one off a hook and flipped it in the air to see if he remembered how to catch it. The mother-in-law he had no recollection of began to gather her things.

"Well, at least he remembers Wonderland."

Alice didn't find this particularly reassuring. "So you mean at least he knows his name?"

"No, dear," Carol said. "I mean at least he remembers he loves you."

Hatter caught the hat on the tip of his fingers just as Alice looked to him.

• X •

It hadn't occurred to her. When had Hatter fallen in love with her? If it was only after they'd begun dating, and all of those memories were gone…

The question was written on her face, and Hatter answered without being asked.

"I don't think how I feel about you is something I could forget," he said simply.

He put the hat in his hands on his head, and Alice felt the tension inside her snap and break away. _There you are_.

"We'll be fine," she told her mother. "Go."


	4. What if I get stuck here?

After she closed the front door, Alice turned to her husband.

"Your son's name is Robert. He's four. We–"

"Named him after your father." Hatter nodded once.

She smiled. "Right."

"'Charlie' is short for Charlotte." Alice kept talking as she began to move around the living room, picking up toys from the floor. "We always meant to call her Charlie, but that's an unusual given name for a girl in our world, so we chose – what is it?" Alice paused because Hatter had an odd look on his face.

"Oh, nothing. Just… 'our world.'"

"Well," Alice stood, a stuffed unicorn in one hand and a plastic truck in the other. "Yeah."

Hatter gathered a collection of picture books from one end of the sofa and stacked them in his hands.

"I like the sound of that. You and me. Having a world together."

There was a crashing sound in the kitchen, followed by crying and a small voice loudly complaining that something wasn't fair.

Alice smiled. "It's a really great one."

* * *

The kitchen conflict ended when Alice proclaimed there would be no more candy.

"It's time to start dinner. Go wash your hands."

Hatter sat at the table. He couldn't stop looking at the kids. _His_ kids. He had _kids_.

They both had Alice's eyes.

With hands still soapy between the fingers, Robert climbed into his lap and set two little cars on the table. He slammed the vehicles into each other repeatedly, imitating the sounds of a crash.

Charlie returned and regarded him quietly for a moment. Then she asked why he was wearing a hat.

"I like hats," he answered.

"Yeah, I know," she said. "But you only wear them when we go out. You don't wear them when we're home. Are we going out to eat?"

Robert swiveled in his lap, an expectant look on his face.

"Guys, I'm making dinner," Alice told them. She'd taken a couple of pots out of a cabinet.

"Why isn't Daddy making dinner?" Charlie asked.

"I thought I'd give him the night off."

"But Daddy always makes dinner."

_Do I?_ He looked at Alice.

She put her hands on her hips. "I know how to cook, Charlie."

This made Hatter smile. Alice, defending herself to a little girl..

"Is something wrong with Daddy?"

Talk about uncharted territory. Hatter didn't want Alice to have to answer all the questions alone, but he was keen to follow her lead.

Alice took a deep breath.

"You remember that he was having a test at the hospital today, right? Well, the test was fine, but it's just taking a little while for the medicine to wear off and Daddy doesn't remember some things right now."

"Like what things?"

"Like where we keep the pots and pans or how we make spaghetti," Alice said.

"I'm sure I can make it next time," he offered.

Charlie only frowned at him. She looked at him squarely and he was reminded of Alice saying "I don't believe you."

"Do you remember us?" his daughter asked.

_Of course you want to go to the casino._ He opened his mouth, but Alice was already speaking.

"He knows he's your dad. He'll… remember the rest later."

Alice started taking items from the pantry, and Hatter thought for a moment that Charlie had moved on. Then the look on her young face let him know things were going to get worse before they got better.

"What if he doesn't ever remember?"

Alice turned from the stove and gave her full attention to her daughter. "He will."

"But what if he doesn't?" Charlie's voice rose.

"Hey, hey," he said, leaning forward in the chair. "Of course I will."

"But if you can't make spaghetti, will you remember how to make pancakes? Because we have those on Saturdays and Mommy can't flip them…"

"Charlie," Alice said warmly. "It'll be okay; I promise."

She came over and knelt so that she was on her children's eye level. The movement caused Robert to stop his play for a moment. Alice took one of his hands and one of Charlie's.

"Once upon a time, I was scared that something might happen to me." She looked at Hatter. "And your daddy promised to take care of me. So that's what we'll do. We'll make sure he's okay."

Charlie squared her shoulders, and Hatter felt something stir. Was that pride?

"I'm going to get the photo album," she announced. "It has family memories in it."

It only took her a moment to come dashing back into the room.

"Thank you," he said as she handed him the book. He took off his hat.

"Hey, could you go put this by the front door? I don't think I'll need it anymore tonight."


	5. The Man Who Knows

After dinner, Alice helped Robert take a bath while Charlie played with some sort of electronic device in her room. Hatter had taken a self-guided tour of their home and ended up in the master bedroom.

Alice strode in and informed him "_Your_ son got water everywhere" in a tone both accusing and gentle.

He was sitting on their bed, looking at the photo album. It didn't even have that many photos in it; Alice always meant to have more printed and forgot. But he spent a long time looking at each page.

Out of habit, Alice pulled off her shirt and jeans and draped the damp clothing over the foot of the bed as she rummaged in a drawer.

She turned and noticed that Hatter's attention wasn't on the book anymore. And then it dawned on her. She was standing there in only a bra and underwear.

"I guess if you don't remember anything, this is the first time for you to see me like this."

He nodded.

"Well." She put her hands on her hips. "Now I wish I was wearing something else. Matching, at least."

"Not a problem for me."

She flushed. He hadn't looked at her like _that_ in awhile. "That look? Isn't allowed until your children are asleep."

Alice saw a familiar mischievous glint appear in Hatter's eyes. She found it immensely comforting. He was in there.

"Also? Just so you know? These? Used to be firmer. And this? Was flatter. Carrying two of your kids to term took a toll."

He grinned and looked at his own midsection. "I seem to be a bit girthier as well."

"Yeah, well, we have two kids and spend very little time running for our lives."

Alice put on a t-shirt and pair of yoga pants.

"I'm gonna get Robert dried off. Can you see that Charlie brushes her teeth?"

* * *

"I'm not brushing my teeth."

"If your mother told you to brush your teeth–" Hatter began his argument with reason, but Charlie smelled weakness and went for it.

"But _you_ didn't brush _your_ teeth growing up, you've said!"

He gave her a long look. He had to wonder if Alice was this exasperating at the same age. Surely not. Himself as a child, though… Perhaps a different tactic.

"How old are you again? Ten? Twelve? Sixteen?" he asked her.

Charlie smiled. "Daaaad. We already told you. I'm _seven_."

Hatter made a show of looking at the ceiling in mock dismay.

"Seven's even worse. At seven, you haven't even met enough people yet, so you've no way to know. Now me, I've met a larger than fair share. And trust me, your mother is top shelf. So if she tells you that you need to brush your teeth, it's good advice is what it is."

Charlie crossed her arms, and Hatter crossed his own. "And I'm your father._ Brush_."

The girl rolled her eyes but picked up her toothbrush.

Hatter looked back through the door to see if his wife heard or approved of his handling the situation.

Alice of Legend was folding laundry.


	6. I trust you

While Alice tucked the kids in, Hatter flipped through a magazine in their living room. He couldn't decide which was more surreal: that he was no longer in Wonderland or that he'd somehow achieved domestic bliss.

"Hey," Alice said softly and he looked up. "Would you mind reading that in bed?"

He looked down at the magazine. "I didn't want to keep you awake."

"What'll keep me awake is if you aren't in there next to me."

He stood up immediately.

In the bedroom, Alice said, "The light won't bother me. If you want to keep reading?"

He'd had his fill of absorbing a new world. "Think I'd rather just be next to you."

Alice turned off the lamp and they got under the blankets together.

"Tomorrow will be better," she said. "I bet your system just takes longer to metabolize whatever it was they gave you."

"I guess we'll see," he said.

Alice cleared her throat; he thought she was going to say something else. Instead, she rolled over, away from him.

Sleep would not be forthcoming.

He was in bed with Alice. His bed. His Alice.

And he was angry.

What if the memories didn't come back? What if they were gone forever. A whole decade of his life, stolen.

How would he protect them? How could he provide for them? He didn't even know what he did for a living.

_Don't think about it. Try not to think about it._

He listened to the sounds of the house. Mechanical hums, muffled street sounds. Like Wonderland, but the rhythms were wrong.

He listened to Alice breathe, deeply and evenly, her back to him. She must be asleep.

He rolled onto his side and shifted closer to her. He wanted to touch her, but he didn't know where he was allowed to put his hand. He laid it lightly on her hip.

The covers moved. Alice reached around and took his hand in hers. She pulled his arm around her and tucked it under her left side. The movement drew his whole body into contact with hers.

He smelled her hair. That he remembered. The sense memory was so strong, his head dropped closer into her without conscious thought. He placed a small kiss on the back of her neck.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" she murmured.

Hatter froze. "Sorry."

She rolled in his arms and peered up at him. "I wasn't telling you to stop."

• X •

Alice realized that she hadn't kissed her husband since he'd woken up in the hospital. Which wouldn't be all that unusual if this were a _normal_ day. But under their current circumstances, it was more like she had _never_ kissed him.

She leaned forward and put her lips to his, softly, giving him the option to return the pressure or not.

He met her without hesitation.

• X •

He was kissing _Alice_.

His _wife_, Alice.

He pushed up on an elbow for more leverage and was pleased when she took the opportunity to maneuver beneath him.

She was warm and soft and when his tongue slipped into her mouth, her hand trailed up his side under his shirt. Her skin next to his felt _amazing_. Nerve endings came alive, and he had to break the kiss to breathe.

He gave a laugh of surprise and leaned his forehead down to hers. "So are you just, um, trying to jog my memory?"

She smiled up at him. "You think that'd work?"

Her hands were on his sides, tracing patterns. He found the movements both comforting and exhilarating.

"I'm willing to experiment if you are," he said.

She leaned up and kissed him again, quickly. Instead of focusing on his lips, she moved to his neck. Kissing a trail along his jaw and then spending more time on his pulse point. It was… effective.

It made him nervous. He didn't know how to touch _her_.

"You're, ah, quite efficient at that," he said.

"You may not remember, but we've done this lots of times," Alice assured him. Her voice was so affectionate, it gave him the courage to voice his thoughts.

"You have me at a disadvantage," he admitted.

He didn't want to say anymore. It was frustrating enough as it was. But Alice understood anyway.

She laid a hand on his cheek. "Hey, we don't have to."

He nodded.

Alice kissed the side of his face and pushed his hair out of his eyes. "You've had a busy day."

"You don't say."

He remembered her telling him that she trusted him. "_Completely."_ How that had settled him. Yes, the Queen wanted them dead and they were neck-deep in hot water at the moment. But he'd felt — that if he had Alice, it was going to be alright. That was still true.

She let go of him and pointed down. "Hey, this? Is my side of the bed."

Tilting her head to the right, she added "That's yours."

Dutifully, he looked at the empty space.

"Over there?" he asked. "Mmm. Seems pretty far. How do you feel about the middle?"

Alice pretended to think about it. "I'm amenable if I get to be the big spoon."

"Deal," he said.

They re-arranged, and Alice molded herself to his back. Her hand was on his chest, and he pulled it up to kiss her fingers.

Her presence made him feel peaceful, and his mind refused to keep racing. Slumber took him quickly.

• X •

Alice smiled to herself when she heard his breathing change. He was always the first to fall asleep.

She'd tell him that, if she had to. Tell him about the first night they shared a bed. (Well, a couch to be more accurate.) Tell him about the days that the kids were born. Tell him why they decided not to go back to Wonderland anymore.

She'd fill in the gaps. If she had to.

She hoped she wouldn't have to.

Because to try and give those things back to him meant they were gone forever. And Alice was not okay with that.

She tightened her grip. Refusing to let him go.


	7. Here I am

When Alice awoke, Hatter wasn't in the bed anymore. She checked the time. Whoa, it was already after seven.

The kids were up by six every morning, and she had to be in the shower by 7:30. Why had Hatter let her sleep–

Oh. Right.

He didn't know their morning routine.

She fought off a wave of sadness and got out of bed.

* * *

In the kitchen, Robert and Charlie were already at the table eating.

And she smelled… coffee.

"Hatter?" she called.

He walked up behind her. "Right, so, I know it's not a Saturday, but I thought–"

"Did you make those?" Alice blinked.

The kids were eating pancakes.

She looked back to her husband.

"I did," he confirmed. "But I _did not_ pour you a cup of coffee, because I know that you don't like it to get cold…"

Her eyes widened. Did he mean...

He held his hands out to the side, like he was revealing a magic trick. Enormously pleased with himself.

The relief that washed over Alice was so strong, she nearly stumbled. She covered her mouth with her hand, like the good emotions were going to fall out and she needed to keep them.

Hatter's arms fell to his sides. "It's all right," he said, and she nodded.

He came to her and wrapped his arms around her, and she gripped his shirt so tight, it would leave stretch marks.

"Also, as we were discussing last week," he informed her, "I've changed my mind, and I think, yes, absolutely we should go to your mother's for Christmas Eve, because—"

The sound Alice made was mostly a laugh and only a little bit of a sob.

She kissed him thoroughly and soundly, only stopping to whisper a phrase he couldn't forget.

"_I missed you._"


End file.
